18 September 2022 -- Boise, ID

Holy shit, I don't know how I haven't written about this before but -- we
shouldn't be using strict definitions, but instead affirmative descriptions!!

As of the time of writing I firmly believe that the cultures we live in have
some massive challenges to face.  In our communities we:  Firstly, are
essentializing humanity and its all-encompassing existence into simply
"identity" and its fractured, structural, rigorous and unchanging,
unadaptable heirarchies.  Unfortunately, sometimes this goes a step further
and we see figures of all kinds boil down this identity into defintions and
performances.

This will only ever leave us with a world that works well for those who are
able to study on "correct," bookly, academic performances of who "deserve"
not even their humanity, but some neutered "identity" -- we deny bisexual
couples their humanity by promoting the belief that "displaying PDA is
homophobic", we say what's "real punk" and what's not, we describe our
cultures in terms of insiders and outsiders ... when we do this, we remove
not just our own liberty, but also everyone else's, who are looking to make a
home and some friends, those who are looking for love and support, and it's
bullshit that we allow our communities to become dogmatic to some of the
extent that we've seen.

As with any worldly community, whether that be LGBTQ+, neurodivergency, black
and indigenous acceptance, and so much more, we really should never allow
ourselves to stoop to the level of strict definitions of what we are.
Instead, if we championed _descriptions_ of our humanity, our goals and
efforts, we end up growing healthy and supportive comrades who will do
everything they can to fight for us and each other.  When we describe the
contents of our characters, we are affirming the humanity we all should be
sharing.

Affirmative descriptions are what birth and age healthy communities.  Strict
and performative definitions are what breed malnourished and diseased
restrictions on our humanity -- and are also what breed the bloodied tools
who enable this system of violence.  Essentialism is not your friend.
Fascists are not your friends.

To protect your transgender and nonconforming friends and family, you might
find it safer to describe their humanity to others.  As just some example,
say, if you have a transmasculine friend, when you have to describe them as
such to your (homophobic) parents, you could say "they have gone through
their life so far dealing with people who continue to make assumptions about
their character.  People have incorrectly denied them their humanity and
masculinity by forcing them to live in a feminine culture they don't feel
comfortable or accepted into.  Regardless of how people perceive or
incorrectly estimate the contents of their character, they are not in fact a
woman due to unchangeable factors like biology -- they are doing what they
can to be human and to be loved by both others and themself, and why would it
ever be our place to say otherwise?"

You could also, of course, describe the above situation using labels as
descriptive or specific as you believe they would want you to use.  You could
say outright that they are your transmasculine friend, that they face bigotry
(name and describe specific events!), and that they deserve love.

Allowing our culture the responsible ability to discern between these two
actions is a far better system and philosophy than, say, believing some of
the stupid shitty micro-definiton-based concepts essentialists want us to
believe, and saying to ourselves "well, my transmasculine friend describes
themself as a lesbian and uses they/them pronouns.  Lesbianism is
exclusively for feminine people, so they are wrong for identifying as such.
No, I refuse to listen to facts that directly oppose this.  Why would I do
that?  ...God, there's so much infighting in the LGBTQ+ community, how are we
going to go about this? :(" [i am using /sarcasm here in this last sentence]

This is _especially_ a terrible system when we go a step further and allow
fascists to pervert our humanity.  I.e, when we let ourselves go just a bit
further into believing in homophobia, transphobia, biphobia, acephobia, to
just name a few.  When we look at our transmasculine friend example and say
"I hate you, I want you dead, you are the reason our community is dying, and
are why we will never obtain the glory of a pure culture" ... I ask, what's
the difference between that and what some Nazi would have written?  What
some trans-excluding "radical" "feminist" would have written?  (Personally, I
prefer to use the term FARTs for terfs -- Feminism-Appropriating Reactionary
Transphobes)

I answer: there is no difference between the authors of such a statement.

They all seek to cause violence, and we need to disarm this potential
bloodshed as soon as possible.  If they can't slaughter us themselves, they
will do what they can to ensure we will do it to each other.  Don't be a
fucking Nazi.

Don't promote strict definitions.  Start describing our humanity or our
identity, or even your own, and you will grow friends and family who will not
just be aware, not just accept, but _affirm_ what it means to be a human.
We will grow comrades who will actually defend each other _because_ of our
humanity, _for_ our humanity.

Be gay!  Be trans!  Do crime!  Love!  I love you all!  Don't let bigots take
this from us!